Short Cuts and Red Lips

Surprise: I cut my hair short again!

My hair is curly and thick, and, in the summer, often feels like I've wrapped my head in a mohair throw. I couldn't take it any longer. I showed up at the salon for a trim, threw my eight pounds of hair over my shoulder, and eyed the scissors longingly. My stylist (Julien Farel, if you're wondering) promised me he could cut a bob that, despite my hair's texture, would be wash-and-go.

I'm not dumb. I've had bobs before, and I've devoted hundreds of hours to disciplining them all with straightening irons because, left to its own accord, my short hair ends up resembling a yield sign. But I decided to take a leap of faith: A) Julien has done magical things with my hair; B) The combination of heat and humidity was starting to give me impromptu dreadlocks; and C) Dreadlocks can work on some people...but are mostly gross.

So I got this cut, below:

It actually almost kind of looks like the style in the photo, so long as I apply a healthy handful of Fekkai Glossing Cream to it every three hours. It also helps if you, like I, are legally blind in one eye. Nevertheless, success! I just have to keep hair products in my purse and maintain a 10' berth around all hoses and sprinklers and, um, rain. But give me credit: I'm not showing up to work with a topknot. (Don't even get me started on topknots. Nubby little topknots are the sweatpants of the hair world.)

However, I was nervous that, besides a triangular head of hair, a bob would put me in the "matronly" zone. (I'm turning 23 on Friday. Therefore, this is a legitimate fear.) Long hair is more feminine—so feminine, in fact, that my grandmother once said I looked like a "sexy hussy," which she meant as an well-intended insult. Insult or not, I was afraid I'd lose that along with the six inches of split ends. The fix? I took a cue from the same photo above and am now married to a dark red lip; my favorite, for both color and wear, is Chanel Rouge Allure Luminous Intense Lip Color in Inimitable. I layer it with balm to dilute the intensity and take the Gaga look down a notch. Note: Don't use lipliner unless you do like the matronly vibe.

Next up: Growing in my eyebrows. Also, posing. And the possibility of rompers. (All inspired by the above photo.)

Photo credit: UFOs Over Baghdad